CRUSH
-----
This woman I know
I like the way she laughs--
it's always warm and relaxed
it surrounds me comfortably
and tickles me into a smile

Oh! and her smile
I like the way she smiles--
genuine & so wide it's contagious!
it splits her face right in two!

Such a curious creature
so lovely
she is both the simple girl next door
and the mysterious "woman in red"
it's impossible not to be drawn to her

No doubt about it--
I like her, very much
and I think about her
far more than I should.
------------------------------------------------


NIGHT MOVES
-----------
Fingers running thru my hair
I'm kissing her skin--
neck--shoulders--waist--hips--
sweat.
Soft moans
forcing their way from
her throat--raspy sounds
mounting pleasure--the heat.
Soft groans
thru clenched teeth
she shudders all over
hot sensations--draining me.
I begin to tremble
she sighs my name.
Awake now--tingling
I think I recognize her body 
in the dark--but I am alone
while she sleeps somewhere
holding her own--? another--?
Obsidian ache, I'm shivering--
I try to crawl back into my dreaming
of a perfect rose--
in full bloom.

ALL I WANT
----------
All I want
is to cook you a few good meals
hear you laugh-- a lot
hold you when you're weary
smile when I hear your name
be the one you lean on--
when thigs get tough.

All I want
is to
be your lover
not your wife or mother--
or a nameless regret.

All I want
is 
everything.



CLEAN EXIT
----------
as we part company
you and i
     and her
a friendly
innocent
platonic
chaste
embrace goodnight-- and
i watch you walk away
     with her
the world has nothing
to offer
that quite compares
to your arms
encircling 
me.



(no title)
----------
sitting in the bar watching you and
talking with you
felt so good... but
sometimes, when I see you
I want to run away and
hide from you...
crawl deep inside myself.
I can't look into your eyes
or you will see...
you will know the truth.
you will know how much
your laughter means
to me.



REGRET POEM
-----------
We can always wonder
what it would be like if...
if you didn't have a girlfriend
if I had better timing...
if I were a different woman
who could steal your heart away--
like some cavalier princess charming.
We can always wonder
wouldn't it... couldn't it...
shouldn't it be easier than this?
I'll always wonder
what it would be like if...




REM SLEEP
---------
I see you there-- night after night
waiting for me
in a dream I can't forget.
There's some kind of magic here
it soothes/tortures me.
Tenderness in your eyes
softer than
a whispered lullabye...
and white heat-- a fire
which consumes my very soul.
I should run away from
those eyes-- but
something pulls me in--
I don't want to turn away
not now.
Fantasy-- safe enough
to let you get so close
to share this passion
share every secret.
Slow motion replay
night after night...
Don't wake me...




NO INTRODUCTIONS (PLEASE!)
--------------------------
She simply walked into the bar--
and I saw it--
the flash of uncertain recognition
shadowed her face...
a look all too familiar
painfully familiar as I grow older!
Jigsaw memories trickle back:
1990? 1991?
I'm waking up/coming to
in her bed--
pulsating headache-- Southern DIS-Comfort!
Jolting reality hits hard and fast
"Good morning Honey"
I don't remember her name!
Oh, God... did I tell her
I loved her lastnight?
Affirmative, though I'm
treating her like a whore
by rushing off without another word.
Outside
I struggle to focus on
less than familiar surroundings
San Francisco? Oakland?
Fumbling with the keys,
I'm slouched behind the wheel--
aware now that
I am sore and reeking of
her too strong perfume and 
stale cigarette smoke--
and sex and latex
and cheap liquor.
I force the door open
heaving violently onto wet asphalt--
I am the epitome of
neo-soft-butch-cool!
She simply walked into the bar--
hand in hand with her
"wife" of ten years now.
There is a silent exchange--
nervous smiles and terror
as I make my exit
once again, without introductions...

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